It happened again I let trust in
Oh what a fickle love affair we have
Like antifreeze in my coffee you burn me deep
Thoughts to wander hidden chambers in my brain
The long dark hallway painted gray with pain
Doors bolted shut would reveal a past thrice forgotten
Liars, cheats, and thieves do deceive a trust so freely given
To abolish a trust hurts not more
Then to demolish the love handed with it
I keep but a circle tightly woven
One thread will not unravel the lot
Burn the end off leave it for dead
The true circle will never be broken
Written 8/9/08
TOO MANY
Too many nights spent tear streaked cheeks
Unsure how it got to this
Wine glass in hand pills strewn across the counter
What a lonely picture painted in my head
So simply heartbreakingly sad
Yet such a painful release across the graceful face
A longing for an end yes but not such as that
The end in sight just a rough
Downers foreseen in an uncertain future full of hope and love
Oh if just once an up could last as long as a down
But the duck sits in the middle of the pond
Wary to look over its shoulder fearful of what was once unseen
Written 8/9/08
LONGING
Longing so now forgotten
Not to touch you or to hear a voice forgiving
Forgiveness given so selfishly
Is only to pass through the ear on a whisper
Whisper such words to oneself
See how far that has gotten
Do you not long for a peace once forgotten
Sadly I must say I wish for thy apology
But my forgiveness will be given with a dead heart
Hurt so badly as I have been how could one expect more
Should forgiveness it will be received with a deaf ear
A deaf ear from a dead heart
As I do care now but will train to let it be
Simpler it is for me to care about you
All good things come in time
Written 8/30/08
FEELINGS HURT
Try so hard to do all the right
Try so hard to have a heart light
Wonder and grace mix with sorrow
But what can be said to help through it all
Nothing to hurt nothing to fall
But lightness to see a heart broken
Darkness to leave everything unspoken
Wonder and grace mix with sorrow
Ever to wonder ever to think
Ever to whisper cries in sleep
Written date UNKNOWN
JUST DON'T KNOW
I can’t get past the thought in my head
To many choices to choose from
Someone please tell me what to do
I’ve never felt so alone in a world so full
To many emotions
To many people could get hurt
How do you know you’ve chosen the right path
There are so many to choose from
I want to do the right thing by everyone
But what if my right thing isn’t your right thing
What if I hurt your feelings
In return it hurts mine
We’ve come so far to feel so far apart
I guess we’ll talk through it a year or two down the road
We’ll continue to do and say the right things in the wrong way
But in the end we’ll know it was all done in love
Written date UNKNOWN
I FEEL LIKE CRYING
I just want to cry today
Cry for what comes to pass
Cry for the life that once was
Cry for the life that will never be
Cry for all the right reasons
Cry in all the wrong ways
So much hate built up in side
Hate for the yesterday
Hate for the today
Hate for the inevitable
Hate for everything that ever was
Hate for everything that will ever be
Sad love song in my head
Play a tune with me
Play a song to make me smile
Play a song to make me cry
Play a song to make me hate
Play a song to help me forget everything
I feel like crying a lot today
Maybe tomorrow it will come
Date written: UNKNOWN
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